First Things First

I can admit it now. I am no Supermom. Its not who God intended me to be and I am okay with that. Again today someone said "I don't know how you do it and keep it together". Newsflash, I don't.

Yesterday I tearfully cried as I told my oldest kids I couldn't give them anymore. I was spent. Nine loads of laundry, four puke buckets and a house that was bleached from top to bottom and I needed them to step up. I needed them to take care of their laundry and help me out.

This wasn't a punishment for them but a realization that I can't do it all. I am blessed. I have it all. I have a wonderful husband (I really do). I have an amazing set of children- they are learning and make mistakes but overall they are wonderful kids and not because of me but because who they were created to be. I have an amazing family in my parents, cousins, aunts and uncles and I have grown to have friends in the community and the community at large that support my family that is not always together, not always in a good spot but trying nevertheless.

In the past year I have learned that I need to say YES when I can but NO first. I was slow to learn this in the fall when I excitedly signed up to lead a troop of girls. I had no idea what keeping on top of a child's education was like. My kids had always done well on their own and I had no clue how lucky I was.

As my troop fell into disarray, I didn't know how I would do it. I wouldn't. That was it. I wouldn't.

Today I sent out that official email letting my troop know that I would no longer be leading. I also emailed the other girls troops and let them know that right now I just can't. I can't keep up.

An amazingly wise woman once told me to say no first then reconsider. How brilliant this woman was. Today I realize I am not a good Scout leader. I stink in fact because keeping it all together was not something I did well at all.

As we close the Scouting chapter of our life I am not sad. I am instead thankful that I had the ability to acknowledge my shortcomings and my inability to give the girls what they deserve and in saying "no" to that I am saying "yes" to my family and putting them first.

As we fill our plates, let us fill the space for family first and add the accompanying parts as we go.

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